Raw Deal - Raw recap for March 15, 1999

RAW

The Rock shows up to start tonight's show. The Rock tells "Stone Cold" Steve Austin that he has exactly 13 unlucky days before he does what he does best: laying the smackdown on his candyass. He proposes two options. The first is Austin finding the nearest set of training tracks, laying his head on the tracks and waiting for the truck to crush his head. The second is Austin coming to WrestleMania, going one-on-one with The Great One, and having his monkey ass kicked all over God's green earth. At WrestleMania, he will prove to Austin and the fans exactly why he is The Chosen One, The Great One and the best damn WWF Champion there ever was. For weeks, he has said he cannot trust "The Big Nasty" Paul Wight, and last night on Sunday Night Heat, Wight and Austin proved they were together as once. He then says WWF co-owner Vince McMahon has not given him any answers to his questions, and demands he come to the ring to "sing his song of monkey crap" to him. Vince shows up and tells The Rock he smells what he is cooking, and that it is a load of monkey crap. He tells The Rock (whom he calls "Dwayne") that he needs a reality check after all he has done for him, and tells The Rock that he has Vince to thank for everything done for his father "Soul Man" Rocky Johnson and grandfather "High Chief" Peter Maivia as well as for his family, then says the WWF Championship is his, not The Rock's, and that neither of them will lose it to "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. He says this may be a bad dream, but there is no chance in hell this will become a nightmare in the form of Austin beating The Rock for the WWF Championship at WrestleMania 15. He tells The Rock that this family. He knows that is personal between them, but he thinks of him just like he thinks of his son Shane McMahon. Through three generations, Vince's family has been looking after The Rock's family, and to protect the family, he reaches out at great expense and brings out Paul Wight (now known as "The Big Show"). Wight may not ever become a family member, but he will do his job and has done his job, and will continue to do so to make sure the WWF Championship stays around his waist at WrestleMania 15. Vince says he may not be "as quick on the update" as they are, but he will make sure The Rock is still WWF Champion. "The Big Show" Paul Wight shows up, and asks Vince what he means by not being "as quick on the uptake" as him or The Rock, and considers taking one of the checks Vince has given him and cashing it on The Rock before giving Vince the change. Vince reminds The Big Show he was brought here at great expense to do a job, and he has done it. He does not like the tenor in his voice, and tells him to continue to do what he tells him as he always gets his money's worth. Vince then slaps him, and that leads to The Big Show grabbing Vince, shoving him in the corner and threatening to destroy him if he ever touches him again. He lets him go, and Vince says he has gone too far and that this is all his fault. He says that their bickering is what Austin and all the fans want, and none of them will get it. Instead, they will get Big Show and The Rock as a functioning unit in the ring tonight, as they will be in a tag team match tonight. Vin e tells Big Show he will be working out some of his frustrations in that match, as one of the opponents will be Mankind. He then tells The Rock that Mankind's tag team partner is Austin. He then tells Big Show and The Rock to shake hands and be the unit that they will soon be at WrestleMania. Big Show and The Rock shake hands, then all three men celebrate in the ring.

A construction crew shows up at the commentary table, presumably to build something.

Before the next match, Jerry "The King" Lawler talks to one of the men on the construction crew, and asks what they are doing. The man does not elaborate on what he is building, and simply states that they are doing a job that they were paid to do. Also, Val Venis says that this is "The Shark Tank," and tells the ladies that if they are looking for some fresh meat to chomp on, he will send them all into a feeding frenzy.

"Road Dogg" Jesse James beats Val Venis to win the WWF Intercontinental Championship! During the match (and for part of the show), the construction crew continues to build something in front of the commentary table. After the match, "Bad Ass" Billy Gunn shows up and tells Val Venis to suck it.

The Rock is seen talking to "The Big Show" Paul Wight backstage. He tells Paul Wight he does not need his help, but Wight tells him that if The Rock, he has to cover his candyass. The Rock says he will slap the taste out of his mouth as much as the day is long.

"Road Dogg" Jesse James is interviewed in the locker room. Road Dogg tells The Rock he is coming for the WWF Championship next. "Bad Ass" Billy Gunn says he is happy for him, but says he wants a shot at the title.

WWF co-owners Vince McMahon and Shane McMahon show up. Shane says he knows X-Pac is backstage, and says beating him at WrestleMania "will be as easy as 1...2...3...kid." Just to show how tough and deserving he is to be the WWF European Champion, he will take on The Legion of Doom (Road Warrior Animal and Road Warrior Hawk). Instead of Animal and Hawk, Pat Patterson and Gerald Brisco show up looking vaguely like Animal and Hawk. Vince McMahon guests on commentary for this match.

Shane McMahon beats Pat Patterson and Gerald Brisco (whom WWF co-owner Vince McMahon insists are Road Warrior Animal and Road Warrior Hawk of the Legion of Doom) after hitting both men with the WWF European Championship. Vince and Shane celebrate after the match. As they head to the back, a house is seen on the TitanTron, and the voice of The Undertaker asks Vince if he knows where he is. He says the lights are on, but nobody is home...yet. However, "she" is coming home, and when "she" does, The Ministry of Darkness will be waiting. The Ministry is seen approaching the house and peering inside. Shane and Vince are in disbelief.

We find out that the house from earlier is WWF co-owner Vince McMahon's house. We then see Vince McMahon calling someone on the phone.

The construction crew is now done, and what they have built have been covered with a black cloth. Jim Ross and "Dr. Death" Steve Williams show up. After we see the WWF Slam of the Week, Jim Ross uncovers it to reveal a smaller commentary table in front of the usual commentary table, with a WWF-style "JR" logo and the words "JR is Raw" on the front. Jim Ross says that he had the table built, and says he cannot believe that people are booing him.

Before the next match, we see footage from earlier today where Kevin Kelly interviews Public Enemy (Johnny Grunge and "Flyboy" Rocco Rock, the latter now known as "Flyboy Rocco" to prevent confusion with The Rock). Flyboy Rocco says that if the WWF executive committee wants to throw them a bone and give them a shot at the tag team titles, that is fine, but they do not want anything handed to them. Johnny Grunge says they want to earn respect in the World Wrestling Federation.

Owen Hart and Jeff Jarrett retain the WWF Tag Team Championships against Public Enemy (Johnny Grunge and Flyboy Rocco) after Jarrett nails Johnny Grunge with a guitar shot to the head. During the match, Jim Ross and "Dr. Death" Steve Williams" get in the way of Michael Cole and Jerry "The King" Lawler's view of the match, and also tries to talk over them. (This continues for a while past this match.)

WWF co-owners Vince and Shane McMahon are seen talking to the police sergeant about what is going on at their house. The sergeant is skeptical, and thinks that this is a publicity stunt because he is watching him on television.

WWF co-owners Vince and Shane McMahon are still backstage. Vince says the cops do not believe him, and that he cannot get in touch with anybody. Suddenly, the phone rings, and Shane picks up. Shane answers, then hands the receiver to Vince, saying "It's him." Vince puts the speaker to his ear, then hangs up after a couple of seconds. Vince tells Shane that the voice on the other end said "It's almost 10 o'clock; do you know where your family is?", implying that The Undertaker was on the other end of the telephone.

WWF co-owner Vince McMahon talks with the rest of The Corporation. He tells The Corporation of his plan to deal with The Ministry of Darkness during the next match.

Backstage, Mankind is seen talking to Mr. Socko, saying he likes having him around but he is the filthiest sock around, and he plans to give him a bath with "The Big Show" Paul Wight's saliva.

WAR ZONE

Mideon vs. The Big Boss Man in a Hard Times Match ends in a no-contest. During the match, The Corporation shows up and all attack Mideon. WWF co-owner Vince McMahon tells The Undertaker that he knows he can see what is going on, and says he will make sure Mideon will never see out of his eyes again and give the signal for The Corporation to destroy him if he does not get away from his home. We then see footage of The Ministry at the front door of Vince's house on the TitanTron, and The Undertaker tells Vince to take Mideon as The Ministry is ready to sacrifices themselves for The Lord of Darkness, as their mission is only to die for him. He then says there are those who are forced to die and never know pain, only pleasure. He tells Vince to do what he needs to do for now, and he will do the same. The camera feed cuts off as a car approaches the garage.

Backstage, WWF co-owners Vince and Shane McMahon continue to get help concerning The Ministry of Darkness' home invasion.

We see footage of Jerry "The King" Lawler and Sable's tour of the Playboy Mansion, complete with Playboy Playmates, the magic wishing well and the Grotto. During the tour, Hugh Hefner shows up. Lawler eventually gets kicked out of the mansion after jumping into the Grotto with the Playmates, but he leaves with a copy of the newest edition of Playboy with Sable on the cover.

Jerry "The King" Lawler is in the ring. He brings out Sabel, who will show the world her entire Playboy spread. Sable shows up, and we see censored images of Sable's photo shoot for Playboy on the TitanTron. It is announced that the issue has been so popular that a second shipment of this month's issue had to be ordered. The sneak peek is over as quickly as it began, and Sable says there will be "no more freebies." If people want to see her, they will have to pay from now on. Suddenly, Tori shows up in a red dress and heels, and says the people can see her for free. She says it took her a while, but Sable made it perfectly clear to her last week that she is just a woman and there is nothing about Sable that makes Sable better than her. She refuses to stand in her shadow for one moment longer, and unlike Sable, she is willing to show everything she has to the people free of charge. She did not come here to talk the talk, but to strut the strut. She knows that Sable is looking for an opponent for WrestleMania 15, and challenges her to a match before asking if she wants some. Sable says this is the difference between them, as Tori just wants some and she wants it all. She says she will see her at WrestleMania, and that she will put her on the map before she drops the bomb on her. Tori says that's fine, and says she has a bom b to drop on her. She then takes off her dress to show her bra and panties underneath.

The police pull up to WWF co-owner Vince McMahon's home. A police officer shows up and searches the outside of the house when nobody knocks on the door.

We hear more from Rodney as well as Willie Green, the latter of whom is obscured by shadows. They talk about how some guy talked about how tough he was until Rodney and Willie Green started a fight with him, which ended up being 20-on-2 until WWF co-owner Shane McMahon shows up and tackled them all.

Not to be outdone by "Road Dogg" Jesse James, "Bad Ass" Billy Gunn beats Hardcore Holly with a Fameasser into a steel chair. During the match, Gunn tosses Holly into Jim Ross' announce table, much to the chagrin of Ross, who yells at Holly for breaking his table. After the match, Jim Ross and "Dr. Death" Steve Williams.

WWF co-owner Vince McMahon is seen screaming at the police, telling them to head back to his home again.

WWF co-owner Vince McMahon says the police saw nothing, yet he is still concerned that The Ministry of Darkness are still at his home. He then hears the voice of The Undertaker on a nearby monitor, where he reveals that the police did not find them, and that "she" will be coming and that he will be there to greet here, and that maybe he could be the father figure she never had...or maybe he could just torture. As the sound of a burning fire can be heard and a flaming Undertaker symbol can be seen, he says that in due time, Vince will be witness to his madness.

"Triple H' Hunter Hearst Helmsley shows up and calls out Kane, telling him that when he plays with fire, he will eventually be burned. He burned Chyna last week, but he knew the fire was meant for him and that it was him Kane wanted to incinerate. All Kane has done, however, is light his fuse. Triple H knows he is backstage, and calls him out for a fight, telling him to feel his fire and that he will burn. Kane shows up, and Kane and Triple H brawl. WWF co-owner Vince McMahon shows up, and calls for Kane, telling him he needs his help, telling Kane that he can talk to The Undertaker. Kane takes his mask off, and we find out that it was The Undertaker the entire time. He grabs Vince by the neck, and the lights go out, saying "It's that simple...anytime, anywhere." When the lights come back on, The Undertaker has disappeared. Vince is distraught.

WWF co-owner Vince McMahon is more distraught than ever backstage.

The Rock and "The Big Show" Paul Wight vs. Mankind and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin ends with both teams fighting each other outside of the ring until the show's end.