Raw Deal - Raw recap for August 9, 1999

RAW

The new millennium is one hour and 25 minutes away!

The Rock shows up. Big Show is about to go in there along with The Undertaker and Paul Bearer, but 'Taker stops him, saying "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait a minute, big man. Let's hear what he has to say; let's let him entertain us." Last night on Sunday Night Heat, Big Show did something he should not have done: putting his big, sweaty palms on The Rock. He says that Big Show did not impress him, and says he has never impressed him from the time his music hits, and every Rock fans stops, take a look and collectively say "I'm gonna take a leak, this guy sucks!" He then talks about how Big Show walks down the ramp, gets in the ring and then does the most impressive thing The Rock has ever seen: raise his hand and yell. Suddenly, Big Show, The Undertaker and Paul Bearer show up. The Rock says he is not running, especially from them, and he takes off his shirt and stands his ground only for the numbers game to quickly take over. Suddenly, X-Pac runs in for the first time in a while and fights off The Undertaker, but he fares no better. "Road Dogg" Jesse James then makes the save for X-Pac, but he too quickly falls to the numbers game. All of a sudden, Kane runs in, and he cleans house.

The new millennium is only one hour and 16 minutes away!

A black limousine parks at the arena, and WWF Commissioner "The Heartbreak Kid" Shawn Michaels is helped out of the back door.

Michael Cole interviews X-Pac and Kane backstage. X-Pac is over his concussion, and it is now time to take care of unfinished business. They took care of some, and now they are taking the WWF Tag Team Championships back from The Acolytes (Faarooq and Bradshaw).

Gangrel beats Christian after The Hardy Boyz (Jeff and Matt Hardy) attack Christian outside of the ring. After the match, The Hardys take the boots to Christian, then Edge runs in and takes out both the Hardys and Gangrel. Gangrel attacks Edge from behind as Edge goes for the Downward Spiral on Matt, then both Hardys and Gangrel attack Edge. Michael Hayes shows up and tells them to knock it off and head to the back, but The Hardys turn on Hayes as soon as he turns around. The Hardys then stomp Hayes, and Gangrel joins in until referees run in to restore order.

Michael Cole interviews The Acolytes (Faarooq and Bradshaw), who agree to put the WWF Tag Team Championships on the line. The whole world saw what they did to Kane last night, and now X-Pac shows up out of nowhere thinking he is the savior. Bradshaw says nobody can stand toe-to-toe with them, including The Undertaker and Big Show, and if X-Pac and Kane want a shot at the tag titles, they've got it.

Jesse "The Body" Venture, the governor of Minnesota, is seen heading to the ring.

Jerry "The King" Lawler introduces Minnesota governor Jesse "The Boy" Ventura. The Body says he has been out of wrestling for a while and has been doing other things, but it is time to review who Jesse "The Body" Ventura. He is a former wrestling champion who knows his way in and out of the ring, and the first referee ever at SummerSlam because it was a deal required again. He is also the only professional wrestler who can legitimately say he was a Navy SEAL. He says there will be a lot of frauds out there who claim to be Navy SEALs when they are not, ran off when it was time to serve their country and "probably played in a hippie rock band," and also only played Navy SEALs in badly-acted made-for-TV movies with "Bozo the Clown haircuts." He says he is the real deal when it comes to being an ex-Navy SEAL and professional wrestler. He says he knows "Rogue Warrior" "Demo Dick" Richard Marchinko and was trained Master Chief Terry "Mother" Moy, and that he is the first civilian to secure Class 226 from Navy SEALs' "Hell Week." He also climbed the rope ladder a week ago on board USS Pearl Harbor and given eight bells and given a salute from both the captain and executive officer. He then announces that SummerSlam takes place August 22nd, and says everybody knows who the power is in Minnesota and why the WWF came to him for a WWF Championship of this magnitude: he is the only person who can deliver law and order to where a champion will be decided in the center of the ring and that that champion will be the best wrestler in the World Wrestling Federation. He knows who the two men are: "Stone Cold" Steve Austin and Triple H. Before he gets to that, he says that if anyone does not believe the power that he has, then they do not see "that scumbag" WWF co-owner Vince McMahon anywhere around. Suddenly, Triple H and Chyna show up. Ventura tells Triple H and Chyna that at SummerSlam, Triple H will get his shot at the WWF Championship, but tells Triple H that he had better work on his wrestling moves because the best wrestler is going to win that night between him and Austin because it is his way or the highway. Triple H says Ventura must be stuck in the '70s and that the air in Minnesota must be doing something to Ventura's brain, throwing him off and making him see and do funny things. When the crowd chants "asshole," Ventura says "I think they're talkin' to you." Triple H says this is not Minnesota; this is his world and where he is standing is his ring. Ventura counters by saying that this is his country, which is bigger than Triple H's ring. He tells Lawler to tell Triple H to look in The New York Times and the L.A. Times today, and see who stood with the President of the United States today. Triple H says he may have stood face-to-face with the President, but right now he is standing face-to-face, nose-to-nose, eye-to-eye with him, and he doesn't care who Ventura is or who he has with him. If he feels like kicking his ass, he will. Suddenly, WWF Commissioner "The Heartbreak Kid" Shawn Michaels shows up, and says Triple H knows as well as he does that Ventura has standards and practices that he must abide by, but he himself does not. He says Ventura will be the most powerful referee in WWF history come SummerSlam, and if the ring is Triple H's world, then he should knows as much as the fans do who brought him into it. Triple H tries to stare a hole in Shawn, and Shawn tells him that if he does not take that glare out of his stare, he's going to knock it off. Triple H shoves Shawn, but Ventura stops Shawn from fighting back and tells him to head backstage at first, but then he whispers in Shawn's ear. Shawn then tells Triple H he would normally beat his ass right here and now, but Ventura has given him an idea. He puts Triple H in a Triple Threat against The Undertaker and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin tonight, and says that it might be Triple H's time, but tonight, it is his way.

"Stone Cold" Steve Austin is seen entering the building.

WWF SmackDown premieres August 26th!

We see footage from earlier today where D'Lo Brown and "Sexual Chocolate" Mark Henry are out jogging. Mark Henry has to use the bathroom n the bushes, and while D'Lo Brown is waiting on him, he is attacked from behind by Jeff Jarrett as Debra tells Jarrett to get back in the car.

Jeff Jarrett attacks Val Venis from behind before he can speak on the microphone before the next match, getting the next match started early. It is then announced on commentary that something has taken place in a stairwell backstage.

Val Venis beats Jeff Jarrett when Debra's apron distraction backfires. Once again, Jarrett blames Debra for losing tonight. Val Venis comes back in the ring and smacks Jarrett, who continues to berate Debra. Val Venis then helps Debra out of the ring.

We find out that "Stone Cold" Steve Austin has been knocked out cold at a stairwell backstage.

An unconscious "Stone Cold" Steve Austin is wheeled into an ambulance, and it is revealed that Austin was attacked with a cinderblock. Triple H and Chyna show up, wanting to know what happened, and WWF Commissioner "The Heartbreak Kid" Shawn Michaels blames this all on Triple H, saying that this is his way of getting out of the Triple Threat Match.

WWF Commissioner "The Heartbreak Kid" Shawn Michaels shows up. Shawn says everybody saw what happened to Austin, and the only problem is who will be held responsible. He wants to know if it was Triple H who assaulted Austin with a cinder block, and calls Triple H out, saying that nobody puts anything over him before Triple H shows up and says he does not even know what happened. Shawn says he taught Triple H everything he knows, but he is the teacher and Triple H is the student. HBK says Austin may be eliminated, but he will still be wrestling tonight, and the Triple Threat Match will be a falls count anywhere, no-disqualification, no-count match for #1 contendership for the WWF Championship. Triple H tells Shawn he earned his title shot and that he cannot do this, but Shawn says he is WWF Commissioner and he can do whatever he pleases. He also announces that to make sure Triple H "is a good little boy," he will be the special guest referee for that match. Triple H says the match still is not happening, as they both saw Austin carried out in an ambulance . Shawn says that if Austin is not here, then there will have to be another opponent. He ponders who would take advantage of this kind of opportunity and even go so far as to stab their own mother in the back to do it, and who would be living in somebody else's shadow for so long that they would jump at the chance to face the WWF Champion. He then says that person, and that person is Chyna. Triple H thinks this is a joke, and says "Chyna's just a girl" and says she could get hurt and that this is no place for a woman. Chyna takes the microphone and says she will take the opportunity and tells Triple H to try her.

Triple H and Chyna are arguing backstage. Triple H says it was a figure of speech, but Chyna says they both have their opportunity and she is taking hers. She also says that if it were a figure of speech, he would not have said she was just a woman.

WAR ZONE

X-Pac and Kane beat The Acolytes (Faarooq and Bradshaw) to win the WWF Tag Team Championships. "Road Dogg" Jesse James celebrates with X-Pac and Kane after the match. X-Pac then takes the microphone and says that this has been a long time coming, and says that if anyone isn't down down with them being tag champs, Kane has two words for them: suck it. Before he can say them, X-Pac takes away the electrolarynx, saying that Kane does not need it anymore, and Kane speaks for the first time with without the assistance of the electronic device. Afterwards, Big Show and The Undertaker rush in and attack X-Pac, Road Dogg and Kane.

We see GTV footage of "Bad Ass" Billy Gunn getting Oriental herbs rubbed on his ass. The masseuse even wears gloves as she considers her own bare hands unworthy of touching his ass.

WWF co-owner Shane McMahon guests on commentary for the next match.

Test and "The World's Most Dangerous Man" Ken Shamrock beat Joey Abs and "The Lethal Weapon" Steve Blackman after Shamrock smacks both Blackman and WWF co-owner Shane McMahon with a Kendo stick. Before the meatch, it is announced that Pete Gas suffered three broken ribs and a broken neck after being assaulted backstage by Test two weeks ago, and that Rodney suffered a separated shoulder and a broken arm last week following the assault on his arm by Test last week. Afer the match, Joey Abs takes a steel chair - used by Shane in an attempt to knock out Shamrock - around Joey Abs' ankle and stomps on it from the middle rope twice in order to take him out of the equation. Shane tells Test he will pay, and Test chases him to the back as referees check on a hurt Joey Abs.

"Bad Ass" Billy Gunn rushes to the medical station in the back, and finds out that the allergic reaction on his ass is poison ivy. Gunn calls the doctor at the station a pervert and leaves, saying he has not been walking around in the woods..

The Rock is seen heading to the ring.

Michael Cole interviews Test, who says that all he has asked is that he and WWF co-owner Stephanie McMahon be left alone, but WWF co-owner Shane McMahon and The Mean Street Posse (Rodney, Pete Gas, Joey Abs) did not want to listen, and he took matters into his own hands. He tells Shane to sleep tight, as it is just the two of them now.

Terry Taylor interviews "The Lethal Weapon" Steve Blackman, who tells "The World's Most Dangerous Man" Ken Shamrock that it is real simple: he will step into his world, the Lion's Den, if Shamrock steps into his: a cage with walls lined with weapons and anyone bad enough to get one can use it. He says this must end one way or another.

The Rock shows up. He tells Big Show that since The Undertaker is booked tonight for a match, that leaves him free, and says that if he has any fortitude in "those little-bitty things [he calls] balls," then he will go one-on-one with The Great One and check in directly to the Smackdown Hotel. All of a sudden, the millennium clock that been on WWF programming for the last few weeks counts down from 15 seconds on the TitanTron. All of a sudden, the arena goes dark and the lights cycle the color spectrum, and pyro goes off on the stage before the world "JERICHO" appears on the TitanTron. The lights come back on, and Chris Jericho - who has been gone from World Championship Wrestling - appears on the stage, his back turned towards the ring and his arms sprawled out and upwards. He turns around and welcome everyone to "Raw Is Jericho." He blows a kiss to the crowd, and says he is the new millennium for the World Wrestling Federation. He calls himself the fans' new hero, the party host and the most charismatic showman to enter everyone's living rooms through a television screen for those who don't know him, and "the ayatollah of rock and rollah" for those who do. He says that when you think of the millennium, you think of an event so gigantic it changes the course of human history, as well as a new era. He says a new era is what WWF sorely needs, as what was once a captivating, trend-setting program has now deteriorated into a cliched, boring, snooze-fest that is in dire need of a knight in shining armor, and that is why he is here. He says he has come to save the WWF. He says that television ratings are in a downward spiral, pay-per-view buyrates are plummeting and mainstream relevance is non-existent, and reactions of the live crowd are silent becuase they are embarrassed to be here. He is embarrassed for the fans, due to the steady stream of uninteresting, untalented, mediocre "sports entertainment" who they are forced to cheer and care for, and says they could care less about every single idiot in the dressing room and especially "this idiot in the center of the ring." He says he fans have been led to believe that mediocrity is excellence, and says Jericho is excellence. Now, for the first time in WWF history, the fans have a man who can entertain them and is good enough for them, and can make them jump off their chairs, raise their hands in the air and chant "Go, Jericho, go!" He says the new millennium has arrived in the WWF, and now that the "Y2J" problem is here, the company - from the front office idiots to all the amateurs in the dressing room (including The Rock) to all the people in the stands watching tonight - will never, ever be the same again. The Rock then tells him to know his role and shut his mouth after three boring minutes, then asks how he dares come on his show and not even have the class to introduce himself. When he asks for Jericho's name, The Rock responds with "It doesn't matter what your name is!" The Rock says he has a plan of his own: the KY Jelly plan, which means he will lube his size 13 boot up, turn it sideways and stick it straight up Jericho's candy ass.

Hardcore Holly tells everyone backstage to tell Big Show that he is looking for him.

Hardcore Holly continues to tell everyone backstage to tell Big Show is looking for him.

"Road Dogg" Jesse James beats The Big Boss Man in a quick Hardcore Match after Al Snow smacks The Big Boss Man in the back of the head with a dog carrier before he can put Road Dogg through a table.

The Rock vs. Big Show ends in a no-contest. During the match, Hardcore Holly shows up, and Big Show headbutts him off the apron. The Rock hits Big Show with a low blow as both Big Show and referee Earl Hebner are distracted, but he is pushed from behind by Chris Jericho. Jericho runs out of the ring, then "Bad Ass" Billy Gunn runs into the ring and attacks The Rock.

Jesse "The Body" Ventura guests on commentary for the next match.

Chyna beats Triple H and The Undertaker in a Triple Threat Match to become the #1 contender for the WWF Champion, making her the first woman in WWF history to do so. During the match, "Stone Cold" Steve Austin is seen backstage, back from the hospital, and taking a steel chair out from under somebody on the way to the ring. Austin then makes his way to the ring and smacks Triple H with a steel chair before putting Chyna on top of Triple H to give her the win while The Undertaker watches from inside the ring, much to 'Taker's chagrin. 'Taker is furious as the show ends.