Layin' da SmackDown - SmackDown recap for March 16, 2000

Big Show and WWF co-owner Shane McMahon show up to start tonight's show. Shane says that the fans think he got what was coming to him on Raw and that it was perfectly acceptable for WWF chairman Vince McMahon to get in his business, knock him down to the mat and strike him with a steel chair. He then says it is not acceptable, as it goes against the moral code of society for any father to take that kind of action as parental abuse is against the law. He also says it is unnatural for Big Show not to go to WrestleMania to compete for the WWF Championship; therefore, he will. We see footage of The Rock's stipulations for Big Show and The Rock's match from Raw, and there is no stipulation stating that if Big Show lost, he would not go on to the WWF Championship match at WrestleMania. Shane then says it is his duty to inform the fans that the match for the WWF Championship at WrestleMania will be a Triple Threat Match between The Rock, Big Show and Triple H. Big Show then assures that with Shane McMahon in his corner, he is very confident that he will emerge from WrestleMania victorious. Suddenly, Triple H and WWF co-owner Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley show up, and Big Show tells Triple H that at WrestleMania, he will once again become WWF Champion. Triple H asks Shane who he thinks he is walking out to the ring and talking about crimes against nature, and says there is no crime, saying that if Big Show is involved, it is a freak of nature. Triple H says that if he loses the WWF Championship to Big Show or The Rock, that would be a natural disaster, but he can see what Shane is doing a mile away and he is not pulling a fast one as Shane knows that Big Show and The Rock cannot beat him; however, in a Triple Threat Match, nobody has to pin him to become champion. Triple H then tells Shane that if he wants a Triple Threat Match, he's got it, as Big Show and The Rock are not going to win and that he will win because he is that damn good. Stephanie then tells Shane that if he will be in Big Show, then she will be in Triple H's corner and that there is nothing Shane can do about it as she has just enough power as he does. Shane then says he hasn't forgotten that she acts and looks like a cheap slut, but does not say "slut" until Stephanie tells Shane "You wouldn't dare say that again." When he does, Stephanie tries to slap him again, but Shane blocks it. Triple H shoves Shane, then Big Show gets in Triple H's face. Suddenly, WWF Chairman Vince McMahon shows up and says Shane and Stephanie make him proud as a father, and says watching them jockey for power every week is like watching a bad soap opera. He then tells them to book themselves on The Jerry Springer Show and get it over with, and to think about their collective accomplishments in the last few months, as they have driven one of the greatest WWF Superstars in history in Mick Foley out of the World Wrestling Federation. He then says that is not good for business, as they also almost drove The Rock out of the World Wrestling Federation, which he says is "damn sure not good for business." Vince then says their public display of "bickering, bitching, moaning, kvetching, moaning, groaning" is not good for business, either, and that is why he has elected to come back and take control of the reins of power in the WWF again before they screw it up for good. Therefore, since Shane insists on being in Big Show's corner at WrestleMania and Stephanie insists on doing the same for Triple H, then he might as well make this a family affair. He then announces he will be in The Rock's corner at WrestleMania, then says "Now that's good for business!" Shane then makes a match between The Rock and Kane for tonight, then Stephanie makes a match between Big Show and Rikishi. Vince then decides to put Triple H in a non-title match against "someone Stephanie McMahon is very comfortable with" and someone Stephanie has something in common with: The Godfather. Vince then says that Stephanie might even get lucky tonight, as she might take a ride on the Ho Train.

The Dudley Boyz (Buh Buh Ray and D-Von Dudley) retain the WWF Tag Team Championships against Edge and Christian. During the match, D-Von pushes Christian into referee Tim White, then Christian dodges out of the way of a forearm meant for him, and D-Von inadvertently knocks Tim White out. Christian plants D-Von with the Implaler, then Terri Runnels places a steel chair into the ring. Buh Buh Ray grabs it, but Christian drop kicks Buh Buh Ray in the back, knocking the chair out of his hands. The Dudleys still manage to hit the Dudley Death Drop to retain the tag team titles. After the match, The Hardy Boyz (Jeff and Matt Hardy) grab Terri Runnels and toss her into the ring with Edge and Christian, who immediately confront her. Edge and Christian leave, but before Edge leaves, he turns around and hits Terri with a Spear after seeing her do her "devil horns" taunt at them.

Backstage, WWF co-owner Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley glances a dirty look at The Godfather's hos.

Before the next match, The Godfather tells WWF co-owner Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley there just might be a spot for her in the Ho Train, but it will be in the caboose. Triple H then beats him up for that remark, starting their match.

The Godfather beats Triple H. During the match, Big Show and WWF co-owner Shane McMahon show up, and Shane confronts WWF co-owner Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley on the apron. Big Show gets on the apron on another side of the ring, and Triple H fights him off until Shane hits Triple H and Big Show attacks Triple H while Stephanie is still on the apron. The Godfather then pins Triple H to get an upset win.

Backstage, an enraged Triple H trashes his and WWF co-owner Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley's dressing room.

Backstage, Al Snow pitches "The Lethal Blackman" Steve Blackman the idea of the two of them in a sci-fi series with ninjas from outer space. He also brings out a little man dressed like a martian, and Blackman says it is a brilliant idea. When Snow leaves, Blackman smacks the little man in a martian suit in the gut with one of his sticks.

The Acolytes (Faarooq and Bradshaw) beat Al Snow and "The Lethal Weapon" Steve Blackman after Mideon grabs Head and AL Snow takes it from him, leading Mideon to get back on the apron. When Al Snow hits Mideo with Head, Faarooq hits him with the Clothesline From Hell for the win.

Rikishi Phatu beats Triple H. During the match, Triple H shows up with WWF co-owner Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley and beats up WWF co-owner Shane McMahon, then hits Big Show with the Pedigree as Stephanie gets on the apron to distract referee Teddy Long. Rikishi then hits the Banzai Drop for the win. Too Cool (Grandmaster Sexay and Scotty 2 Hotty) show up and dance with Rikishi after the match.

Backstage, Bob Backlund talks to a guy working in the building about the Crossface Chicken Wing before putting him in it at the behest of Kurt Angle.

Backstage, Big Show throws things around in response to losing to Rikishi Phatu thanks to Triple H.

Before the next match, Kurt Angle says that Long Island, New York is going through some very hard times. He says the economy has plummeted, that Amy Fischer has been set free from jail, and their hockey team is in shambles. He then says that tonight, the fans not only have one hero to look up to and cheer for, but two, as Bob Backlund is with him. Backlund then says he stopped wrestling because of the "voluminous cavity" that the fans have fallen into, and says that "Mr. Ingles" will bring them out of that cavity and put morality back into their lives. Suddenly, Chris Jericho and Chyna show up, and Jericho tells all the Jerichoholics here tonight that tonight is a very special occasion, as the two biggest nerds in all of America are standing in the ring. Jericho admits that he wants to ram his fist up Backland's backside and use him as a ventriloquist dummy. After making fun of Backlund, Jericho tells Backlund he will procure a rapacious incursion courtesy of Y2J. Tazz then shows up and tells Angle and Backlund that someone is going to get choked out, and there are only two things they can do: nothing and like it.

Chris Jericho and Tazz beat Kurt Angle and Bob Backlund by disqualification. During the match, Tazz chases Backlund through the crowd and gets him in the Tazzmission, then Jericho gets Angle in the Walls of Jericho only to be attacked from behind by Chris Benoit. After the match, Chyna gets in the match and beats Benoit up, but she is attacked from behind by Eddie Guerrero. Benoit then hits Angle with a top rope diving headbutt.

Jonathan Coachman is grabbed by Kane, who asks where X-Pac is.

We see footage from earlier today where Crash Holly is forced to defend his WWF Hardcore Championship at the local Fun Time USA. The Headbangers (Thrasher and Mosh) - sans makeup - bring referee Earl Hebner to the building, and Mosh finds Crash upstairs at the arcade, where he beats him up. Crash takes the fight downstairs by taking the slide, where Thrasher is waiting for him with a trash can in his hands. Despite The Headbangers' attempts to work together, Crash escapes through the front door and manages to hold on to the WWF Hardcore Championship.

We see a video package narrated by Kevin Kelly chronicling the recent bad blood between The Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young. It is announced that Mae Young is still convalescing in a medical facility, and that "Sexual Chocolate" Mark Henry - who is still distraught following recent events - was unavailable for comment.

Backstage, Kane attacks Triple H and X-Pac in full view of Tori and WWF co-owner Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley. Triple H and X-Pac manage to trap Kane inside the back of a truck.

Lilian Garcia interviews WWF Chairman Vince McMahon, who states that if X-Pac is that hellbent on detaining Kane and Kane cannot make it to the match against The Rock, then X-Pac should take Kane's place in the match tonight.

Dean Malenko retains the WWF Light Heavyweight Championship against Grandmaster Sexay. During the match, it is announced that a #1 contender's match between The Hardy Boyz (Jeff and Matt Hardy) and The Radicalz (Perry Saturn, Chris Benoit) will take place next. Later on the match, Eddie Guerrero gets on the apron, distracting referee Jack Doan, and Dean Malenko mocks Scotty 2 Hotty's Worm, allowing Eddie Guerrero to attack Grandmaster Sexay only to be sent into the ring post. Grandmaster Sexay goes up top, but Eddie Guerrero topples him off as Scotty 2 Hotty is still on the apron and referee Jack Doan is distracted, allowing Malenko to retain. After the match, Too Cool (Grandmaster Sexay and Scotty 2 Hotty) attacks Guerrero and Malenko, who are then forced to retreat. Chyna then runs out and attacks Guerrero from behind before hitting him with a DDT.

Tony Garea and Sgt. Slaughter try to free Kane from the inside of the tractor trailer.

The Hardy Boyz (Jeff and Matt Hardy) vs. The Radicalz (Chris Benoit and Perry Saturn) ends with both teams brawling outside, with neither team becoming #1 contender to the WWF Tag Team Championships.

Backstage, Triple H tells X-Pac that there is nothing he can do about replacing Kane in his match against The Rock, and tells X-Pac that he and WWF co-owner Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley will get him out of this.

X-Pac beats The Rock by disqualification. Big Show and WWF co-owner Shane McMahon show up just before the match begins, then Triple H and WWF co-owner Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley show up shortly afterwards. Later on in the match, following distractions and interference from Tori, Big Show and Triple H, Kane shows up, gets in the ring and attacks X-Pac before chasing him into the crowd. The Rock then fights Big Show and Triple H, throwing Triple H into Big Show in the corner and getting away when Triple H and Big Show beat each other up. WWF Chairman Vince McMahon is seen enjoying what is happening from backstage as the show ends.