Monday, January 10, 2000

Nitro-Glycerin - Monday Nitro recap for January 10, 2000

WCW Commissioner Terry Funk comes out of a limousine outside of the arena to start the show, and alongside him is "The Living Legend" Larry Zbyszko, "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff and "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson.

Shane Douglas guests on commentary for the next match.

David Flair and Crowbar retain the WCW World Tag Team Championships against The Revolution (Perry Saturn and Dean Malenko) and The Filthy Animals (Konnan and Kidman) after Saturn splashes Rey Mysterio Jr. through a table near the stage, which leads to Rey leaving on a stretcher.

It is announced that Buff Bagwell and Diamond Dallas Page will meet later tonight, and if they attack each other in the first five minute s, there will be a $50,000 fine levied by WCW Commissioner Terry Funk.

The New World Order (Bret "The Hit Man" Hart, Kevin Nash, Jeff Jarrett, Scott Steiner) are in the building. Nash gets a birthday gift in the form of a couple of women. Meanwhile, WCW Commissioner Terry Funk, "The Living Legend" Larry Zbyszko, "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff and "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson are seen watching this on a monitor somewhere backstage, and they are seen leaving the room.

Rey Mysterio Jr. is convulsing as he is being placed in an ambulance outside of the arena. Meanwhile, Scott Steiner is seen spending some time with a group of women, promising to make love to every one of them before the end of the night.

Oklahoma show up with a bottle of barbecue sauce in one hand and a broom in the other. He says he is tried of all the "hootchies" around here who cannot realize that their place is in the kitchen, barefoot, pregnant and cleaning the house, and if they aren't doing any of those things, they are useless. He says that Ralph Kramden would not have allowed Alice to get in a wrestling ring, and says "that silicone freak" Madusa needs to learn her role, which is handing her husband his slippers and his beer, and if she can't, then she is no good. He plans to give Madusa a taste of what will happen to her at Souled Out when he takes the Cruiserweight title from "her cellulite-riddled waist." He then issues an open challenge to any woman who thinks they can beat her. That challenge is answered by Asya, and as Asya beats Oklahoma up, Madusa shows up while Oklahoma smacks the bottle of barbecue into the side of Asya's head. Madusa sees this and gets in the ring, but Oklahoma stomps her before hitting her with the broom. He then takes the WCW Cruiserweight Championship off her waist and raises it up into the air..

WCW Commissioner Terry Funk, "The Living Legend" Larry Zbyszko, "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff and "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson are seen heading towards the ring. Meanwhile, the rest of the New World Order (Bret "The Hit Man" Hart, Kevin Nash, Jeff Jarrett) are looking for Scott Steiner.

WCW Commissioner Terry Funk, "The Living Legend" Larry Zbyszko, "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff and "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson show up. He tells Kevin Nash that he will have to do more than powerbomb him through the stage to get the best of him, and if it war he wants, it is war he will get. He says that he picked Orndorff, Zbyszko and Anderson off the unemployment, and the four of them are "The Old Age Outlaws." However, they are still young enough to kick The New World Order's (Bret "The Hit Man" Hart, Kevin Nash, Jeff Jarrett, Scott Steiner) ass. Anderson says that if adversity doesn't kill you, it makes your stronger. The nWo nearly killed him and he doesn't feel stronger, but he is still ready to look for the nWo and attack them from the shadows to get some payback. Zbyszko says the nWo will learn and realize that they are not looking at four individuals, but at tradition, and it has risen up against them. If it were not for them, the nWo would not be in the wrestling business. The world has gone through its millennium madness, but it is the same old century, and there are no powers that be or an nWo that will make it to the 21st century unless it is over their dead bodies, as legends never die. Orndorff says the last three to four weeks have seen young wrestlers from the Power Plant sit in the front row, and they have worked to keep the tradition that they have started alive. Some people may think The Old Age Outlaws may be past their prime, but he can stay up with the rest of them and he can still fight with the best of them, and The Old Age Outlaws have kicked every ass they've had to kick to get to where they are now. He says that if The Old Age Outlaws don't have another bite in them, they are wrong, as they are going to take a chunk out of the nWo's ass. The nWo shows up. Kevin Nash says it is ironic that The Old Age Outlaws have gotten their "early bird dinner" in, and says he was going to wait until Souled Out, but now Funk has to learn the hard way. He says he should be buying a couple of new suits so he can look good as WCW Commissioner next week compared to Terry Funk, then tells Funk what he has to say. Funk asks if that is all Nash has to say, because if he does not, he will tell him what his role in WCW is. He makes each and every match, and he is making all the match tonight. Tonight, Jeff Jarrett gets a couple of stipulations, and tells him he will be in three matches tonight. The first is a wrestling match, the second is a Bunkhouse Brawl, and the third match will be a Cage Match. All of the matches will be against one of Funk's close, personal friends. Jarrett says that is fine, but he wants to know who the opponents are, so he can kick their asses just like the Tennessee Titans did to the Buffalo Bills last Sunday. If one of them is Zbyszko, he will have to apologize for stretching him like he has never been stretched before. Funk says he will not be up against any of the Old Age Outlaws, but it will be against three of his close, personal friends. Jarrett hopes they don't die before they get to the ring. Funk says he does not have to worry about that, as he is going to be in the ring . Nash asks if Anderson will be special guest referee. Funk says he won't, but he has a referee in mind for the matches, and that referee is "The Canadian Crippler" Chris Benoit. Bret says he can't do that, but Funk says he can do anything he wants, and puts Bret in a match against Nash with the WCW World Heavyweight Championship on the line. Bret says they won't fight each other, and tells Funk to get a new idea. Funk tells them that if they take it easy on each other, he will see that they are suspended for a year from WCW without pay and that Bret will be stripped of the title. Nash and Bret say that they will take the year off, saying they don't need the money. Funk reminds him he will strip him of the World title. Scott Steiner says something, but as soon as he calls Funk a "son of a bitch," the rest of his statement is censored with a censor bleep. Funk tells Scott Steiner he is clear to wrestle and does not want to see him get crippled in the ring, but he is going to do something his mother should have done a long time ago and wash his mouth out with soap.

WCW Commissioner Terry Funk is backstage with "The Living Legend" Larry Zbyszko, "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff and "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson. After telling Anderson to go look for a certain person, he says this will be a night that The New World Order (Bret "The Hit Man" Hart, Kevin Nash, Jeff Jarrett, Scott Steiner) will never forget.

Buff Bagwell and Diamond Dallas Page are seen approaching the ring.

"The Enforcer" Arn Anderson is seen looking for somebody outside of the building.

Kimberly is seen entering the arena.

"Mean" Gene Okerlund brings out Diamond Dallas Page and Buff Bagwell. DDP asks Okerlund to get out of the ring. He does. DDP asked if he pissed Buff off, and Buff says he pushes a few buttons. DDP says he's just getting started, and Buff asks how Kimberly is. Page says "I dunno, why don't you tell us?" Buff says that they're just friends and that he is a great listener. He then says he sees a sparkle in his eyes, and says he doesn't know if it is DDP that got the shortcomings. Page asks about Buff hitting on Kimberly and buying her drinks all night long at the bar in Little Rock, Arkansas, but Buff insists they're just friends. He says that he called him while he was in Los Angeles, California and told him that he and Kimberly were having problems and that he missed her. He then says that instead of listening to him, he tried to get Kimberly in his bed. Buff asks what would happen if DDP had an affair with one of the boys' wife, and says the sexual chemistry could be cut with a knife. Buff says that if that is what DDP Is saying, he would have done the same thing. DDP says he wouldn't, and Buff says he wouldn't, either. DDP asks why he should trust Buff, but Buff asks why he should not trust him. If DDP wants a lie detector test, he will do it. Buff tells DDP he overreacted, then Buff asks the crowd if he is a liar. DDP says the problem he has is the boys in the back mentioning how Buff keeps talking about how sexy Kimberly's birthmark is. He says it is not the one everyone can see, but the one only he can see. Buff says he's seen it, and so have all the boys in the back. DDP punches Buff in the face - after the five minutes come to an end as they talk about the birthmark - then notices Kimberly watching on a monitor backstage on the video screen. Buff Bagwell then pulls out a baton and whacks DDP with it, saying he did not do anything.

Kevin Nash is seen talking backstage with Bret "The Hit Man" Hart while Jeff Jarrett paces back and forth. Jarrett tells Bret and Nash to work things out while he has his matches. Bret tells Nash they will have their match, and after an argument, Nash says he will be a four-time World champion.

"The Enforcer" Arn Anderson finds the person that he is looking for.

Jeff Jarrett brings out a wheelbarrow full of weapons before the next match. The Old Age Outlaws ("The Living Legend" Larry Zbyszko, "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff, "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson) then show up, and Jarrett's first opponent is revealed to be none other than George "The Animal" Steele, who brings his own weapons to the ring.

George "The Animal" Steele beats Jeff Jarrett in a Bunkhouse Brawl Match after the turnbuckle eating Steele is hit with a guitar by Jeff Jarrett only for Jarrett to fall victim to a spinebuster by "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson. Special guest referee "The Canadian Crippler" Chris Benoit then places Steele on top of Jarrett and makes a fast count to give Steele the win.

Scott Steiner asks which of the women nearby loves champagne before making love to some more "freaks."

Jeff Jarrett tells Kevin Nash to throw Bret "The Hit Man" Hart out of The New World Order. Nash says he will do it when he takes the WCW World Heavyweight Championship. Jarrett tells him not to go through with the match, since he and Bret will be giving WCW Commissioner Terry Funk what he wants, but Nash says that Bret is the one running his mouth.

WCW Commissioner Terry Funk tells "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson to head to the limousine and get the next guy.

"Mean" Gene Okerlund interviews Stevie Ray. Stevie Ray grabs the microphone and says everyone wants to know what is going on with him. He tells everyone to listen up, and says he does not care about the fans not liking him. Seven years ago, he and Booker T came to WCW, and the people backstage never wanted them there and did everything they could to keep them down. All that changed when Booker T got a little success out on his own, saying the Television title is all they wanted him to have. He asks how Booker T is going to turn his back on him and the neighborhood, and says that just because he comes out with fine suits and shoes does not mean he is not from the streets anymore. At Souled Out, he wants something. Before he can say what that something is, Booker T and Midnight show up. Booker T tells Stevie Ray he will not fight him after all they have been through, but Stevie Ray says he wants the match. Booker T then tells Stevie Ray that he made his decision last week when he whacked him and Midnight, and says he will never wrestle him. Booker T turns around to leave, but Stevie Rayturns him around and slaps him. Booker T then tells Stevie Ray that if he wants a fight at Souled Out, he's got it, but "this shit won't be fixed."

Jeff Jarrett talks to Bret "The Hit Man" Hart backstage, while "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson finds the second man.

The Old Age Outlaws ("The Living Legend" Larry Zbyszko, "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff, "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson) show up. Funk says that when you talk about fire, you talk about the next legend, and he guarantees that he can light up the ass of any nWo punk. He says that this person is a former WWF Intercontinental and Tag Team Champion, and that person is Tito Santana, whom he brings out. When Jeff Jarrett shows up, he pushes Buffalo Bills player Ted Washington at the front row, then pushes Orndorff into a nearby steel chair.

Tito Santana beats Jeff Jarrett. During the match, Jarrett gets physical with special guest referee "The Canadian Crippler" Chris Benoit, and Ted Wasshington of the Buffalo Bills climbs over the guardrail and gets on the apron, distracting Jarrett, as does "The Living Legend" Larry Zbyszko. "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff gets in the ring and hits Jarrett with a piledriver, then Tito Santana pins Jarrett with a fast count for the win.

Thunder is now on Wednesdays on 9:05 PM Eastern, 8:05 PM Central on TBS.

Tank Abbott shows up. He says it is only six days before he kicks Jerry Flynn's ass and he finds out what a Tank beating is all about. Right now, he wants to talk about Head of WCW Security Doug Delinger, saying he can fine him all the money he wants, but he cannot take his pride or integrity. He gives Dellinger the chance of a lifetime to take a shot at him, and tells him to "waddle [his] fat ass out here" and take a poke at him. Dellinger shows up and gets in the ring, and Abbott dares him to punch him. Dellinger punches him, and Abott gets on top of him just in time for security and local law enforcement to move quickly into place. Abbott is immediately handcuffed, then Jerry Flynn runs into the ring and takes Abbott out with a kick to the side of the head.

"The Enforcer" Arn Anderson finds the third man: "Superfly" Jimmy Snuka.

Bret "The Hit Man" Hart and Kevin Nash are seen getting ready for their match. We then see special guest referee "The Canadian Crippler" down on the floor backstage as if he has just been attacked.

Before the next match, Jeff Jarrett says he is not a Buffalo Bill or a "damn loser." He is from Tennessee, and he is a winner, just like the Tennessee Titans, and just like Chuck Wycheck, he is the chosen one. He tells "Superfly" Jimmy Snuka to get in the ring, and admits that he was the one to take out "The Canadian Crippler" Chris Benoit before the match.

"Superfly" Jimmy Snuka beats Jeff Jarrett in a Steel Cage Match. During the match, "The Canadian Crippler" Chris Benoit shows up to referee the match, but Jarrett kicks him off the steel steps leading into the ring. When Jarrett re-focuses on Snuka, Benoit grabs Jarrett and hits him with some knife edge chops before throwing Jarrett into the steel cage. Jarrett crotches Benoit on the top rope, then leaves the cage, grabs his guitar, tosses it in to the ring a nd tries to use it as a weapon only for "The Living Legend" Larry Zbyszko and "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff to stop him. Snuka then goes for the Superfly Splash from the top of the cage, and Benoit climbs up the cage with him to hit a diving headbutt from the top of the cage to give Snuka the win.

Scott Steiner is still making love to the women.

It is announced that fans can log on to WCW.com to vote for the 14 best matches of all-time, with the winning matches making the cut for a video of the fans' favorite WCW matches to be released later this year.

"The Living Legend" Larry Zbyszko and "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff tie Scott Steiner up so that WCW Commissioner Terry Funk can wash Scott Steiner's mouth out with soap.

Kevin Nash vs. Bret "The Hit Man" Hart for the WCW World Heavyweight Championship ends in a no-contest. During the match, it is announced that Jeff Jarrett has suffered a concussion after his match with "Superfly" Jimmy Snuka. Later on in the match, Kevin Nash sends a steel chair into the ring, then "The Enforcer" Arn Anderson hits Nash with a metal pipe and tells referee Charles Robinson to get out of the ring. As Anderson screams at Bret, Sid Vicious sneaks into the ring from behind and kicks the steel chair into Bret's head. The steel cage above the ring comes down, with Bret, Sid and Anderson in the ring. Sid choke slams Bret, then hits him with a powerbomb. Sid pins Bret, and Anderson makes the "three count." WCW Commissioner Terry Funk then shows up with a flaming branding iron, and brands Nash in the stomach with it to end the show.

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